And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
