i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
