Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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