Midget sex pt 2 tonight
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
