No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
he high fived his dick after we had sex
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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