Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
