She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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