these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
