I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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