we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
