they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
