TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
false alarm. still invincible.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
