They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
