rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
