i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
