He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
