So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
