Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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