it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
