Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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