counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
