I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
