Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Randomize
