I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize