I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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