A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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