just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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