sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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