So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize