Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize