i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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