Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
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