She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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