That's intense
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
