Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
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