i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
