Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
