Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
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