why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Randomize