Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
