i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
