forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
No stitches, just platelets and will power
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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