yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
