Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize