brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
