I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
