4 words: hood of his car
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I understand Curling. That high.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
