Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
