i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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