How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
so explain again why im purple
no
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
My cat gives me a boner
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
